You’ve hit a road block. You’re wondering how did you get here? You were on top of life just a few weeks ago. Where did it all go wrong? What the heck happened? Well, here’s 3 things you can do to get unstuck.
Well, let’s start with: “it’s life”. Life is a roller coaster of ups and downs. It’s how you know what the good times are.
So don’t worry if you’re in a rut right now. It’s not forever. It’s normal. It’s quite alright to feel this way.
And if you’ve been here before, maybe several times, life’s trying to teach you something. So, how can you learn from this?
Who are you and where do you want to be?
Usually in these low points you feel even worse about yourself because you’re not being the best version of you.
Your thoughts, values, and behaviours aren’t quite singing from the same song sheet.
When your actions don’t match your beliefs or values, psychologists call that cognitive dissonance. A.K.A. mental discomfort or, psychological stress.
So, how do you get back on track?
1. Describe the kind of person you want to be
Who would you love to be? Really?
Someone who’s so confident in herself that whenever someone gives you their unwelcome advice, it just rolls off like water on a ducks back, rather than upset you?
Or maybe you’d like to be someone who handles their finances so well that you forget when payday comes, because you’ve got more than enough in the bank?
What about being someone who get’s up early every day & doesn’t want to tap the snooze button because you’re so well rested, you can’t wait to start the day?
Have a think. Who would you love to be? Describe exact situations like the examples above.
Use this basic formula:
“I’d love to be [desired trait], because [the desired effect it’d have on your life].”
If you’re having trouble deciding on who you’d rather be, take a look at the things currently going wrong in your life. Ask yourself, “what would be better than this?”
2. Think about what your day to day would look like
This is the step you take right before making it happen.
Say you were the person you wanted to be. What would you day look like? What would you do differently?
For example, if your desire was to be more confident – you might start small by sticking an affirmation on your mirror. Then, in the mornings when you’re getting ready, you read it.
You could even update your phone, PC or tablet wallpaper to a new inspiring quote every Sunday for the week ahead.
And if you were to take it a step further, you may talk to someone new every day. It might be as small as asking your local barista what they’ve got planned for the weekend.
3. Do something small to make it your reality
Just like in the examples above – think about what super small things you can do to make it a reality.
If you want to be fitter, maybe the first step is take the dog for a walk down to the end of the driveway and back.
Eventually, when you feel ready, you’ll move on to something more challenging – like running a track in the bush after work.
If your goal is to be more organised, it might start with waking up 10 minutes earlier for a week. And then 15 minutes earlier the week after that. Just small 5 minute increments until you reach your goal.
So have a think.
What small thing could you do today to make it your reality?